The Pills
by PrayingForAMiricale
Summary: Kagome starts to feel even worse than before about herself when somem dead beat jerk calls her an ugly fat cow. Even better she's moving back home and he's coming too! And why is he so mena to her? InuKag
1. Chapter 1

Silver Hair

AN- Enjoy .

"Kagome! Dinner!" Mum called up from the bottom of the stairs, I had no intention on coming down to eat.

"Kagome Higurashi! Come down now! I have worked very hard on this dinner!"

Blah blah blah 

"Kagome!"

"What?" I pushed myself off the soft mattress laying on my bed and made my way over to my dresser; hoping if my Mum came upstairs she would think I was getting dressed.

Mum's footsteps could be heard coming up the steps as I quickly fumbled through my belongings throwing all types of shit onto the floor.

"Kagome!" Mum stood in the doorway, her eyes appearing stressed, her breath choppy.

"Hmm?" I hummed, hoping she would turn around and go away.

"You were up all night again weren't you? You were with that…that _boy _again weren't you?!"

"What if I was?"

"For God sakes Kagome! Do you think I don't care about where you go at night? Well I do! Kagome! I'm so damn worried about you when you leave! I never know when I'm going to see you again! Look at yourself! You sleep all day and then get up at night and go partying with your friends! Is this the way you want to live? Kagome if you don't get your act together I'll…"

"What? You'll what Mum? Send me back to Tokyo?"

Mum starred blankly at me and responded in Japanese, "That's exactly what I'll do."

Hearing her speak that language always gave me the chills, how she always spoke with her tongue moving in so many different directions; you could get lost watching. I of course spoke the language fluently but I could never master the tongue art that Mum did.

Realizing what she had just said I too starred back at her, a look of "you wouldn't dare" plastered on my face.

"Dinner." With that Mum turned and left my doorway, leaving me dumbfounded in a pile of wrinkled clothes and stained bras.

"Fuck." I slammed my hand down on my dresser and then turned to look at myself in my mirror that hung from a nail on my wall. The mirror only showed my knees and up from where I was standing. I gazed at myself, glancing at my tangled black hair and my once tan skin, that was now nothing but an off white color. I raised my hands to my head, letting my fingers run threw my hair until I gripped the tresses so hard that I screamed and then fell to the carpeted floor below me. "I hate you!" I shrieked. Most people would think I was talking about my mother but that wasn't at all what I meant. I was yelling at myself. The girl I had become. Life use to be a breeze for me, I had all A's and B's, I was on the Acadia Junior High cricket team for girls. I had tan skin, I ate right, and I had never snuck out of the house once. Once the end of Junior High came around, however, I changed. I slept in all the time, I did my homework but slept in class so I never understood any of it, and I started sneaking out late at night; first on just weekends but then weekdays too. Mum talked about sending me back to Tokyo to live with my dad, who I despise, but she never lived up to it. She normally would just use it as a way to get me to listen to her. But this time, she was serious. I could see it when she gave me that smirk of hers. It always meant that she was going to do something that would piss me off. And living with my dear daddy would do just that.

When I was four I remember hearing Mum and Dad always fighting about their relationship or lack-there-of. I never understood why they would yell so much until one night I couldn't sleep because of all the ruckus they were making. I tiptoed downstairs until I could clearly make out what they were saying.

"I hate you! I can't believe I ever married such a worthless pig as you!" Mum was yelling in Japanese, which they both did whenever they wanted to argue. They thought it was better than English because I couldn't understand much Japanese at that age.

"Please! Megumi! Please, listen to me! Hear me out! I'm sorry! It meant nothing!"

It took me awhile to catch on because I was four and completely oblivious, but after a few hours Mum kind of unintentionally spelled it out for me that Dad had had an affair.

That moment was like having my dad wrap his hands around my neck and squeeze as hard as he could and smile the whole time.

Once Mum started to cry I left and went back upstairs, shutting my door tight. The rest of that night I camped out in my bathroom, which was attached to my room, and slept in the bathtub until Mum came in the next morning trying to gently tell me that we would be leaving Dad behind, for good.

The following weeks were filled with Mum getting boxes of our belongings ready for the big move to England. When she told, me that night that she wanted to get far away from him…she wasn't kidding. Three months later we were settled into our new house and ready to start over. I continued to grow up speaking both English and Japanese, which turned out to come in handy at times. When I turned seven Mum started dating some guy that she worked with, two years later he proposed and they got married.

Now I have two half brothers and three stepbrothers. Two of my stepbrothers are already married and have families of their own but the youngest one, Xander, is sixteen a year older than me.

"Kagome, Megumi wants you downstairs."

I looked up from the floor, let go of my hair, and starred inanely at Xander. His normally auburn hair was darker due to the lack of light in my room. Xander leaned down to where his eyes were parallel to mine as I continue to gaze at him.

"You okay?"

I nodded. Xander and I never use to like each other at all. When his dad first proposed to my Mum we both use to try to kill each other, hoping that if we succeeded the other parent that didn't belong to us would hate us so much that they wouldn't marry the other. Of course our plan failed, but on the day of the wedding when I came down stairs and saw him all dressed up and he saw me, we both realized that we couldn't change what fate had thrown at us and decided to bare with it. As we got older we both formed a bond that no one could break. Not even our parents or brothers. "I'll bring you up some food if you don't want to go downstairs."

"I'm okay…I'm just in a mood I guess…that's what Mum calls it anyway."

Xander nodded. "What was all the ruckus about Tokyo? She still using that to get to you?" Xander grinned hoping his small joke would make me smile, which it didn't.

I shook my head. "Ha… I think she really means it this time."

My stepbrother's eyes widened, "I'm sure she didn't. Now come on, after dinner I'll take you to the mall over on the other side of London. We can talk for awhile ok?"

"No that's okay. You have things to do. I know that you're going out with Macy and Brian tonight. I'll probably call Jason. We'll go somewhere and talk. You go have fun and forget about your worthless good for nothing sister."

"Shut up." Xander pushed my to the ground and started to "play" punch me. I played back until Xander's dad called both of us to come downstairs.

---

"Kagome, phone." I reached over the couch and grabbed the phone from Mum's hand.

"Allow?" I said with a hint of a French accent in my voice.

"It's me. Meet me outside, I'm in the driveway."

"Now?"

"Yes now, you dimwit."

Ignoring the comment I hung up the phone and headed over to the front door.

"Where you going?"

"Out."

My step dad watched as I quickly unlocked the front door.

"Where out?"

"I'll be back later." With that I slammed the door behind me and made my way to the end of our driveway.

"I just met the coolest people ever!" Jason lit the end of his cigarette, took it in, and then handed it off to me.

I took a quick puff and then responded, "This is what you wanted me out here for?"

"Uh, yea. We're gonna meet them done at the lake tonight with a group of other people from all over the world!"

"What? You're making no sense." I starred at my friend wondering what he had been smoking before he came over.

"My stepbrother's dad is taking in foreign exchanged students from other parts of Europe, the U.S., and a few parts of Asia, like India, China, and Japan. He had nothing better to do with the summer. He got like two form Japan."

"Japan?"

"Yes, Japan. Anyway, apparently the kids he's looking after made a few friends at the embassy place that they all had to stay in for a few days. Most of them are from Japan though…well, these kids can speak English pretty well and most of them are staying for a little over a month. So we've made plans, we, as in my step-bro and his little foreign friends, to hang out until they all leave. So hurry up and get ready cause I'm leaving in five minutes.

"Uh…right…"

"Come on, Kagome! These guys are amazing! They do all kinds of crazy shit!"

"I'm too tired. Go without me."

"Damn. You ruin everything. And you're going. Now hurry up!"

How Jason talked me into going was beyond me, but I think that my step dad yelling at me when I came back inside made me make up my mind.

"So, how are things?"

I glared at him wishing he would stop acting so dimwitted.

"I see."

"Listen. All I wanna do is meet these losers you keep harping about and then go home and sleep. I'm tired."

"How? You sleep all damn day. I called your house like ten times and your step dad finally answered just to tell me you were asleep and to stop calling."

"Well, did you."

"Ha, no."

I shook my head.

"How many drugs have you been taken?"

"I'm not on drugs."

"Then why are you always so tired."

"I don't know okay? Can you just shut up, Jason?"

"I can."

"Will you?"

"I get it."

"Thank you."

"Hey, Jason! We're over here!"

Jason and I looked over to see a group of guys standing on the Yates's dock. A guy, obviously Jason's stepbrother, was waving his hand wildly at Jason and me.

"Beer?" Once we reached the group Todd handed Jason a beer and then went to offer me one.

"No thanks."

"Aw, come on Kagome. You could use some alcohol."

"Trust me, no I couldn't."

Todd smirked and turned to face the group of people in front of us.

"Jason, Kagome… Inuyasha, Miroku, and Koga." Todd pointed at each guy as if they were meat.

"Hey." Jason nodded and then took a swig of his beer.

I stood where I was, my arms crossed and my focus on the lake a few feet away from us.

"Kagome? You gonna say something'?"

I turned my head to face Todd, "I didn't know I had to."

Todd frowned, "What's your problem?"

I ignored the question, twisting around to get off the dock and over to the sand below it.

"What's her problem?" I heard Todd whisper to Jason.

"Period I guess."

I picked up a rock and threw it at Jason's balls. "Fucker!" I yelled.

"What the fuck is your problem?" Jason, in relief that had I missed, jumped down from the dock and walked over to where I stood.

The silver haired guy that stood on the dock with Todd started to chuckle lightly, his friends joining him.

"You got something you wanna say?" I bellowed.

"Yea," he replied smoothly, "I think you're one hell of a bitch that should get rid of her attitude if you know what's good for you."

"You know when I asked I wasn't really looking for a reply."

Inuyasha, as Todd had called him, jumped off the dock and made his way over to me. "Then why'd you ask?" his breath smelled of cigarette smoke and alcohol.

I looked away from him, focusing my eyes on the lake.

"I see, you gonna play games now?" I could see Inuyasha smirk from the corner of my eye. "You're pretty ugly. Wouldn't hurt to lose some weight too, you cow."

I spun my head around and glared at him. "I bet you have a dick the size of a pen."

"That the best you could come with?"

"Yea. It was."

"Amateur."

"Whatever. I'm leaving."

"Aw, you're a baby too."

"You leaving so early?" Jason questioned, beer still in his mouth.

"Jason, suck balls." I said, ignoring Inuyasha.

I made my way out of the woods and up the path back to the main road.

"Asshole." I muttered.

---

"You smell like smoke."

I sniffed my shirt and then pulled it off, throwing it to the flow. "There, happy?"

Xander shrugged, "Not really, seeming that now I have to look at you naked."

"I have a bra on."

"It's still an ugly site."

"Then stop…" my focus drifted from Xander to back at the lake.

"_You're pretty ugly. Wouldn't hurt to lose some weight too, you cow."_

"Jackass."

"What the hell? I was kidding!"

"Not you." I walked over to my dresser and pulled out a worn, red tank top. I pulled it over my head and moved it around my body, letting it fit with my figure. When I looked up I saw myself in the mirror on my wall again. I glanced at myself, looking up and down and left and right, looking over my body.

"You okay?" Xander ambled over to where I stood; he too looked in the mirror.

"Xander?"

"Yea?"

"What do you see?"

Xander's eyes met mine as he glanced at me with uncertainty. "What do you mean?"

"When you look at me, what do you see?"

Xander thought a moment then responded, "The most amazing sister I could ever have."

I snorted leaving Xander by the mirror and plopping down on my bed, squeezing the stuffed panda he had given me on my eleventh birthday.

"Why are you asking me stupid questions?"

I rolled over, the overhead light shinning brightly in my eyes.

"I don't like myself." I didn't mean to express my feelings to Xander, more so I was trying to convince myself that I was feeling them; he just happened to be there to here it.

"I was with Jason tonight."

"What did that bloody punk do to you? I'll kill him! I swear, Kagome, I'll kill him!"

"He didn't do anything. We were by the lake with a few of his brothers…his stepbrother's friends. Apparently Todd's dad is taking in foreign exchanged students.

"Right." Xander laid down next me, watching as I gently stroked my panda.

"I don't know. They all seemed jerky to me, but one called my ugly and fat. He didn't mean it, I could tell, but it still pissed me off."

"So now you think you're fat and ugly? Just because one ass wipe said so? Kagome…"

"No, it's not because of him. I've been in some weird mood lately where it seems like I hate the world and the world hates me…I know that's not true but it still hurts to think about it at times. Damn…I'm even confusing myself."

Xander sighed. "Sometimes…I don't know." Xander placed his arm around my shoulder and leaned up against me. "Sounds like you have a pretty good view on how much life sucks…but you can always find a way to keep your glass half full. Did that make sense?"

"Surprisingly."

"Ha! Good."

Xander smiled, his blue eyes glistening in the light of my room. Those eyes use to hate me once, how I was happy that those days were over.

---

Jason let out a cloud of smoke from his mouth and then handed his cigarette over to me. I slid the round paper between my fingers and looked around the skate park.

"So…" Jason looked to the ground avoiding my eyes, "about yesterday."

"What about it?" I rushed my words.

Jason coughed, "So how did you like the guys?"

I glared at him but he didn't see my look; he was too busy focusing on the floor.

"I thought they were ass wholes."

"They really aren't that bad."

"You know what?" I rose from where I sat and looked out over the park, "I've had enough of you." I threw down my cigarette and grinded it into the ground with my foot. "Later."

"Kagome…"

I continued to walk away from Jason, fed up with his weak sense of self.

By the time I had made it back to my house I had smoked seven cigarettes, hitched a ride with two guys that were obviously wasted, and ignored eight calls from Jason on my cell. As I made my way up my driveway I could hear yelling coming from the inside of my garage door. Making my way through the garage I could see Xander and Mum; Xander throwing his arms in the air every time he went to speak and Mum motioning her hands in a way to try to calm him down.

"Why the hell do you do this? You say you're going to do something then you never do it, but when you finally decide it's "the right thing to do" you hit us with it without warning?" Xander was using all of his voice to deliver his message. I cringed whenever it was his turn to "talk".

"Xander, both your father and I think that this is the best thing for not only Kagome but for the family."

_Oh God they're talking about me, _I thought.

"How? So she can live with her dad? The guy that _you_ had decided was a _horrible_ man and wanted to get away from her? How fucked up is that?"

Oh…It made sense now. 

"Xander, I…" Mum looked over to the door and out its window to see me standing there, head down and arms crossed. "Kagome!" she gasped.

I pushed open the door and walked past both my brother and her without one glance to either of them.

"Kag…"Xander held out his hand but then put it down. I continued on my way until I reached my room, where I plopped down on my bed and sobbed until I fell asleep.

---

"We really do think that it's best, Kagome." Mum sounded calm but I knew inside she was falling to pieces.

"After a year if you have gotten your act back together you can come back and everything will be like before." My step dad explained. I didn't give a rat's ass what he had to say and figured I'd let him know.

"Shut up! Why the fuck do you think I want to hear _anything_ come out of your God forsaken mouth!?"

"Kagome!" Mum shrieked but I paid no mind to it.

My step dad rose from the table, his mug of coffee in one hand and a sports magazine in the other. "This is for the best, Kagome. Please try to understand that."

When they had finally told me that I was leaving to live with my dad, I had already known due to the "conversation" Xander and Mum had had before hand. However, the news still hit pretty hard and I figured that I wasn't going to get over it for a while. When it came to packing though, I couldn't seem to get through one bag of luggage without Mum over my shoulder saying, "Are you sure you want to take _that_ too?"

But when it finally came time to leave, Xander wouldn't come to the airport with us. Instead he chose to spend the whole day before with me, and every ten minutes tell me how much he was going to miss me and how much he hated our parents.

What had surprised me the most though, wasn't the whole scenario of me going back to Tokyo or the fact that Xander was more pissed off than I was, but the plan ride that would take me back "home". When I had finally fastened my seat belt and let the fact that I was going back to my dad sink in, I turned my head to look out the window by the two seats next to my own and saw a man sitting there. Not only did I know this guy, I knew him as a jackass, a jerk, and…as Inuyasha.


	2. Chapter 2

The Pills

Chapter Two

AN-SECOND CHAPTER IS UP!

The airport smelled like coffee and old people once I had left the plane and made my way inside the actual building. Picking up my three bags, I left inside and walked out of one of those spinning doors where you pushed one side to make the whole door move. Xander and I use to play in those all the time when we went to the mall with Mum.

More old people.

Old.

Old.

OLD.

_Damn,_ I thought. An old couple, along with many other people, stood in front of me blocking my view of the street; where dad, or one of his "friends", would be picking me up.

Once again I found myself getting anxious and decided to pull out a pack of cigarettes that I had recently bought at one of the gift shops.

"Can I use your lighter?"

I turned to face that God-awful silver hair that seemed to haunt me.

I glared at Inuyasha, placing my light back into my back pocket. "Nope."

Inuyasha smirked, "You really are a bitch aren't you?" he let out a small chuckle. "Fine," he stated, "I'll get it myself." Reaching his hand behind me he gently slipped his hand into by back pocket where it rubbed up against my butt.

"What the hell?" I yelled. Reaching behind me, I tried to get his hand out of my pocket but it was no use; he had my lighter and the privilege of touching my butt.

"Give it back!" I grabbed for my lighter as he carried on with lighting his cigarette. In the process of trying to get my lighter (and pride) back, I ended up burning myself on the small flame. "Fuck!" When I turned around I noticed that Inuyasha and mine's little "scene" had gathered a small crowd.

BEEEP

"Kagome!" a familiar voice called out from a recently washed black Honda.

I turned once again to Inuyasha, who was done with the lighter, and peered at the light in his hand.

"Call it a gift." I mumbled.

With that, I proceeded in gathering my things and made my way over to the Honda.

---

"Who was that? Hojo questioned.

"Some guy I met at the food court." I lied.

"Ah ha." Hojo made a tight turned onto a less busy street than the others we had been on. "Welcome back to, Tokyo."

"Yea…I'm not getting much of a "welcome" feeling." I peered out my window and watched as rows of upper class houses passed by, the reminder in the back of my head that one of them would be mine.

"Don't say such things."

Another turn.

"Miziyaka is very excited about seeing you. Hey! You see that house over there? The one on the end?" Hojo pointed to a tall house that was connected to all the others around it. The door to entry way was on the corner of the sidewalk; making it the first thing you saw when you turned the corner.

"Yea…" I tried to act interested.

"It's yours." Hojo smiled at me as he continued to drive on.

"Uh, Hojo…if it's mine then why are you driving right past it?"

"Oh, did I not tell you? Miziyaka wanted you to come by the office. Then you two will go out to lunch and _then_ you'll go home."

A practical Miziyaka Higurashi, I thought, Of course he would want to meet at his work…

---

It seemed that I couldn't escape the sent of coffee and old people, even when I had entered Dad's office.

"Right this way, Mrs. Higurashi." I tall, slender woman lead me in the direction of a large, leather chair that sat in front of an even larger desk. "He will be with you shortly." With that the woman turned and left.

I stared blankly out the large window that was plastered before my eyes. I watched as people made their way through crowds, waited for taxies, and exited stores. I knew it would be awhile before my father would build up the courage to come see me right away. As I sat in that oversized leather chair I felt an overwhelming sensation creep over me that I just wanted to disappear and leave the whole world behind me, for good.

"Kagome?"

Apparently he had more courage than I thought.

I waited before turning my head to face the voice that stood in the doorway behind me. If I didn't turn around then I would still have some dignity left in me, something I could still call _mine, _not another person's wish for me. Of course, however, I lost it when I turned my head.

"Oh, Kagome," my dad paused to let out a long sigh, "it's wonderful to see you."

I stood up from my chair and waited for my father to speak again so I wouldn't have too. When there was an awkward silence between us I realized it was my turn, and there was no backing out of it.

"Sure." That one, simple word had surprised me. I knew what I should have said, but what had actually come out was what I had _wanted_ to say.

My dad gazed at me; a small flicker of hurt showed on his face but disappeared just as quickly. "I know that this visit isn't exactly what you wanted, but," I waited for the rest, which seemed forever until he finished, "I hope we can let this time we have together be remembered as a good memory and not a sour one."

I nodded. Somehow, I knew I had wanted the same thing, but to admit to that with words would have been way to simple for my take.

"How about we go out to lunch in a few minutes? Then after that…well I have a little more work to attend to but Hojo can take you back to the house, and you can get settled in. How does that sound?"

"Fine." I mumbled.

I thought I had heard a small sigh come from his lips, but then again it could have just been my own frustration playing tricks on me.

"Alright then, where too?"

I gazed back at him with an expression stating that I didn't know what w_here_ there _was_ to go to.

"Right…how about…maybe you should go back to the house now and we can skip lunch and go out to dinner later."

"Sure." I stated flatly. I couldn't help but wonder if I was going to live through the next year or so of being here.

"This is your room." Hojo waved a hand in the air as if he were trying to point out the obvious that this small open space was mine.

I glanced hesitantly at the baby blue walls and the queen bed (which took up half the room) with its pink comforter and white sheets with frilly lace attached to the edges of them. There was a small table located to the right of my bed with a lamp and a cordless phone placed neatly on top. A dresser was placed to the left about five inches away from my window. At least I found a little sense of happiness when I saw the computer and desk on the other side of the room. Maybe I wouldn't die after all.

I slowly walked around my room until I stopped myself to look outside the window. Down below stood numerous amounts of people, bicycles, and street vendors. Being in Tokyo, of course, I wasn't going to see too many cars, but the ones that floored by were of course the most elegant and expensive. I left my gaze from the outside world and focused it back on the hideous world of my father's complete and utter idiocy. It was true that he hadn't even talked to me for about eight years, but he could have at least used common sense to figure out that, being fifteen, I would most likely have grown out of the "pink frilly lace blue walls" faze and moved on to something more…teen. But, of course, that was asking for _way_ too much.

"So what do you think?" Hojo could see the irritation that flew through me and made an effort to smile, as if that was going to make this moment any better.

"Well I would absolutely be head over heals for it…if I were eight."

"Bare in mind that that was around the last time he saw you, Kagome."

"Bare in mind I'm a teenager and he lives in Tokyo where the styles of teens these days are rather obvious."

"You know your father…"

"That doesn't mean he knows me."

"Kagome," Hojo's face was stern, "give him time to get to know you. That's one of the reason's you're here, right?"

I responded, my face just as stern, "I'm here because my step-dad thinks I'm a delinquent."

Hojo shook his head, "Then let's try to make this experience a good one so your _real_ dad won't think that too."

I considered this, but only for a slight moment. "Fine," I mumbled and then crossed my arms over my chest.

"How are things in London?" Dad took another bite of his salad before I answered.

"Okay I guess."

"Just okay? Well, what do you do everyday?"

I took a sip of tea before answering. "I wake up, eat, hang out with my "friends", go home, and sleep."

"Well, that's something isn't it?"

"I guess."

Dad frowned, "Kagome, please, I really want to get to know you better. I haven't seen you in so long. It's nice to actually have the living proof of my daughter's existence in front of me."

I crossed my arms over my chest and leaned back in the booth. "I don't do anything, Dad. My life consists of nothing special or of value. Just ask Mum." My Japanese sounded awful when my British accent mixed with it.

"I wish it was that easy." He smiled and then put down his fork. "Your mother doesn't even want you here with me. Over the phone she sounded," he hesitated," concerned, for lack of a better word, that you were going to move back here. If she had any other place for you then I'm sure she would have put you there."

"Believe me, I know." I smirked and then reached for my tea again.

"I wanted nothing more than for her to let me be apart of your life. I already knew you so well I didn't want to lose that. However, it's very clear now that I did."

There was an awkward pause. How could he expect her to let him in on my life when he completely ruined theirs?

"Why did you do it?" I broke the silence.

Dad directed his gaze away from me, but for the first time since I had seen him I watched him intently. His forehead was wrinkling as he rubbed his temples with his index fingers. His hair showed signs of aging with little strands of gray hairs scattered around his use to be jet-black hair.

"I'm being honest when I say I really don't know, Kagome." He let out a long sigh that seemed to last for moments at a time.

"There had to be some reason," I insisted. There was no way he was getting out of this one.

"Kagome," he paused, "I was young…stupid…I thought I could do anything. In those times…your mother and I were going through many problems. Some financially, some in other places, but for the most part we didn't have any common sense. You were born when your mother was twenty-one, I had already finished school and was working on being excepted into a multi-million dollar company that would have given us pools of money, but your mom was still in school working on becoming a doctor, it was very stupid of us to even think about having a child then but somehow…we did.

"I didn't think that it would be that big a problem. We hired a nanny to watch you when your mother and I were out, you had friends to play with, toys, games, and anything you wanted. Once your mother dropped out of medical school, however, thinking that it was better for her to stay with you, she couldn't handle the job of a stay-at-home-mom. She claimed that it was even more stressful than school or any job she had. I had hoped things would work out and that we could make some sort of "plan". We started to fight more and even separated a couple of times but we always came back to each other. When I had that affair…it wasn't because I didn't love your mother it was because I felt trapped and helpless. I called it off way before things went too far but I know that doesn't make it any better. Your mom and I had separated for a while when it happened. I thought that things were really going to be over and that sooner or later she was going to file for a divorce. Well…she did…after she found out what had happened. When you two left she wouldn't tell me where you were going or even if you were coming back. I had hoped that she would have stayed in Japan at least for awhile, learning that she had moved to another continent all together almost put me into shock." Dad took a sip of his tea and looked over his shoulder to see if our food was coming out of the kitchen. Apparently his salad didn't fill him up enough. "They're running pretty slow tonight." He somewhat mumbled his words.

I wasn't at all upset that our food hadn't arrived yet. I wasn't very hungry, either that or I wasn't paying much attention to my hunger if it was there.

After a few moments a silence, our food had finally arrived. Dad munched on his…well whatever it was as I silently ate my over sized salad.

"Are you feeling well? You're not eating much."

"I guess I'm not very hungry." I sat back in my booth and reflected on what Dad had said early about him and my mother. Mum never told me what reasons Dad had had to have an affair, but I suppose even having a reason didn't make it any better for her, like he had said. I was too young to really grasp the whole meaning behind what "cheating" really was. Mum had always explained it as "when a mommy or daddy loves someone else more than who they married". Of course she would make him the bad guy because in this case he technically was. But it would have been nice if she had told me that they were on the verge of separating anyway. The only thing that even made the affair and "issue" was the fact that she had at last minute decided she wanted him back. I couldn't help but wonder if it was her instead of Dad who had gotten "dumped" if she would have done the same thing and welcomed compassion and a companionship when it was offered to her. What if some young, good-looking guy had come to her in her time of need? Would she have stepped over that fine line between right and wrong?

"Kagome?"

I snapped out of my thoughts and glanced at my father who appeared to be paying the bill.

"Are you finished? You didn't eat much."

I slightly nodded my head, "I told you I wasn't very hungry," I almost whispered.

"Okay. Well, what would you like to do before we head home? It's not too late. We could probably find some fun before we head back. Maybe we could-"

"Actually," I interrupted, "I was wondering if I could take a walk to the park and hang around there for a while. It's not to far from the house. I'll come back before it gets too late."

Dad slightly frowned, but then decided to agree on the idea. "That's fine. I'm sure you would probably like some time to yourself. You go ahead. Would you like me to ride with you down there? We could take a taxi and-"

"That's okay. I'll be fine walking. It's not too far from here." My gaze was on a waitress trying to keep her cool while some man yelled at her about their food being cold. Obviously she wasn't their waitress, for she looked around frantically trying to find the rightful one.

"Right." Dad folded the tiny booklet with the bill inside it. "You go ahead then. You have a phone right? I want you to call when you would like to come back. I don't want you walking home by yourself."

I nodded my head and then rose from our table. "I'll see you later." I slowly walked away from my dad leaving him and the still screaming man behind me.

The park turned out to be a much farther walk than I had anticipated. The sun had just started to set as I sat myself down on a nearby swing.

Back and Forth.

Back and Forth.

I turned my gaze to the ground and watched as my feet moved around particles or dirt. A breeze blew through my long hair and sent shivers down my bare arms. Even after all that talk about the divorce, the anger I had felt over my hideous room, and the whole trip here in general, it seemed that no matter how hard I tried my thoughts continued to lead back to one person. Inuyasha.

He had pissed me off so much that one night that I couldn't seem to get his voice out of my head. When I saw him on the plane going back to Tokyo that made everything even worse. Every minute or so I would glance over in his direction and completely embarrass myself when I would meet his gaze. At some moments he would burst into laughter when he would look over at my confused and irritated face. Sometimes I would feel his eyes on me so I would turn around and give him the bird. Everything seemed to make him laugh or somewhat _content_.

"_You're pretty ugly. Wouldn't hurt to lose some weight too, you cow."_

"GAHH!!" I stomped my foot into the dirt and grounded it in until my toes felt like they were about to burst open. "I hate you!" I screamed.

Another breeze blew by and this time I ignored the shivers running down my arms. Suddenly, all I could feel were the warm tears that begun to run down my pale cheeks. He had no right to say those things, I thought. I felt even more stupid for sitting in a deserted park crying over a few words that some guy I didn't even know said to me. All my life I had put up with names and people trying to bring me down. What made his words so bad that they caused me to feel the way I did? I forced my foot into the dirt again but gave up after the pain in my toes returned.

"This swing taken?"

I gasped when I heard the familiar voice behind me. I wanted to act like he wasn't there, like he was just another guy that I had seen on the street, but I knew that there was no way I could restrain myself from turning around and looking at him.

"What do you want?" I hissed.

"An answer." He smirked as he grabbed one of the chains connecting the swing to the rusted pole above it.

"No. It's not." I turned my head and looked out over the empty playground.

"So…" he breathed, "do you always yell at yourself when you're alone, or do you just do it on special occasions?" his smirk never left his face.

I didn't face him, "Who says I was yelling at myself?"

This seemed to amuse him, "Who else is there to yell at?"

This time I faced him, "None of your damn business."

"I see." He leaned over placing his elbows on his knees and held his chin with his hands.

"What are you doing here?"

"Well, I do live here you know. Pretty funny how we ended up at the same place at the same time twice."

"I don't find it all that funny."

"Oh really?" he lifted an eyebrow. "What would you call it then?"

"Annoying." I said, flatly.

"Ah, I see." He stated again.

"Will you answer my question now?"

"I come out here when I want to think."

"That's a classic, you better give me something better than that."

He chuckled, "Alright. I wanted to get out of the house…maybe halfway hoping you would be here."

I stiffened, "I don't find you funny."

"I figured that last part would piss you off." His smirk came back.

"Damn right it did." I rose from my swing and started to move away from him. It didn't matter where, just as long as I was putting a fare amount of distance between us. Of course it didn't matter how far away he was, he would always make his way back.

"Aw, come on, Kags, I didn't piss you off that badly did I?" he still sounded amused.

I stopped myself, my arms crossed across my chest. "Don't you ever call me that again."

"What? Kags?"

"Stop it." I was mad now.

He beamed, "He have quite a temper."

"Leave me alone!" I bellowed.

His smirk went away for a moment. "Can't a guy have some fun?"

"No! Now leave me alone!" my cries almost sound like pleads.

"You're still mad about what happened in London, aren't you?"

I directed my focus to the ground.

"Ha. I thought you were stronger than that." He wasn't smiling now he almost looked disappointed.

"Please, just go away," I whispered. I had started to turn around when I felt his hand grip my wrist.

"I can see now that you're not nearly as strong as you lead people to believe." His voice was just a whisper too, but it was much more fierce than my own.

"You know nothing about me!" I tried to sound harsh but my words weren't nearly as powerful as I had hoped they would be.

I could see his smirk was slightly back, "Are you still annoyed? Or are you scared now?"

"Why would I be scared?" I shot back, my anger had returned.

"Because you're in a place where no one is around with a guy you know nothing about except that he called you a few names not too long ago."

"I'm not afraid of you. Inuyasha, let me go!" I pulled my wrist away but he had tightened his grip. "You're hurting me!" I began to pound on his chest with my free hand. "Let go!"

Inuyasha started to smirk again and this time even added a laugh with it. "Come on ugly. Let's see what you can do." He let go of his hold on me and let me pound at him. My efforts were useless for he hardly even flinched.

"I want you to leave me alone." I stated coldly, after I had given up on my attack.

"You can't always get what you want now can you?"

I ignored him and turned to walk away once again. This time he didn't follow me.

When I returned "home" I could still see lights on in my Dad's office window. The door was left unlocked so I pushed in open and entered, a burst a cold air hitting my on the way in.

"Kagome? Is that you?" I could hear Dad as he moved papers around and pushed himself out of his chair.

I walked over to his opened office door and would have kept going if he hadn't appeared in the doorway.

"Where have you been? It's past midnight."

I looked at the clock on the hallway wall and answered, "I guess I lost track of time."

Dad's face appeared to be somewhat angry, but I noticed that he was too tried to scorn me at the time. "Why didn't you call?" He asked as he rubbed his forehead with his right hand.

"I don't know. I didn't think it was that late."

"You didn't walk home alone did you?" This seemed to wake him up a bit.

"No…I…got a ride home…with a friend…"

"A friend?"

"Yea…he's some guy I met on the plane. He's staying here too. He offered to take me home." It was so easy to lie when the person you were lying too was too tired to even be aware of it.

"Oh. Okay…well…next time can you please call?"

"Yes, and I'm sorry." I faked a smile and then a yawn. "Do you mind if I go to bed now? I'm pretty tired."

"Of course. Good night." Dad kissed my forehead and then I proceeded up the stairs to my room.

Once I entered the world of baby blue and eight year olds I plopped down on my bed and rested my chin on my arms. I rolled over and stared at the ceiling above me.

"Damn…" I mumbled.

I looked over at my computer and decided I was too lazy to get on it just to find out that it probably didn't have any Internet or instant messenger of any sort. Instead, I lifted myself up to change out of my clothes. I pulled my curtains over to cover my window and then slipped out of my jeans. I rummaged through my bag, and pulled out of a pair of baggy, black, pajama paints that had Hello Kitty's face plastered all over them. Next, I pulled off my red tank top and replaced it with a white tube top that clung tightly to my body. I pulled my hair up into a ponytail and then headed to the bathroom across the hall from my room.

After I had flipped the light switch on, I stopped and gazed at myself in the mirror. I saw nothing but an ugly, pale nobody. I glared at the reflection in front of me with disgust. Inuyasha was right. I was nothing but an ugly cow.

I turned the faucet on and splashed water on my face over and over until it became hard to breathe. I suddenly stopped, ignoring the running water, and let myself sink to the tile floor below me. I pulled my legs close to my chest and rocked back and forth, my head resting in my arms.

"Get out of my head." I whispered. No matter how hard I had tried, Inuyasha wouldn't stop haunting me. "I hate you."

Pushing myself off the ground, I turned off the water and retired to my room, where I flipped off the light and dropped myself on my bed. I had fallen asleep before my head had even hit the pillow.

"Kagome?"

"Mmmm." I groaned as I awoke to a bright light in my eyes.

"I'm leaving for work. If you need anything Hojo's number is on the counter. He said to call whenever you needed him.

"O-ka-y…" I grumbled.

"See you later." Dad shut my door, his footsteps echoing down the stairs.

I turned over to look at the time. 6:35. "Uh!" I threw a pillow over my face and screamed.

The next time I awoke was on my own. I saw that it was now 8:15 and convinced myself that I wouldn't be able to fall back asleep, so I pushed myself out of bed and fumbled down the stairs to the kitchen. Hojo's number lay neatly on the counter where Dad said it would be, next to it was a list of places to go to get breakfast. I later found out that this was necessary in order to get something to eat in the morning. I wasn't in the mood for food…no actually I was starving, but I held back the urge to eat until I was at the point where it felt like I was going to die. I decided to preoccupy myself with other things, so I ran upstairs to change into shorts and a blue, spaghetti strap tank top and pick up my MP3 player to go out for a run.

Tokyo's streets were crowded with people, which made my morning run one of those easier-said-than-done things. I decided to cut my run short and slipped into a small café shop.

My entrance made an annoying bell go off and also directed everyone's _attention_ to me. One of the girls behind the counter looked up from her magazine just to look back down again once she saw it was only another pointless person that had entered. I noticed that she was wearing blue eye shadow and had her left eyebrow pierced. I turned to look away from her and examine the rest of the room. The café was lit with dim lights and painted earthy colors; tones of red and brown. A door was opened to the right of the counter and seemed to lead into another store. I figured I'd bypass the café and look around the other store, seeming that I didn't have any money and at least I could actually look as if I were about to buy something in the other place.

I was pleased to see that the door lead to a drug store, I seemed to be prone to illnesses and needed a place to come to when Dad wasn't home and I didn't want to be bothered with Hojo and his happy-go-lucky moods. My attention turned to the pharmacy, and then it dawned on me that I had something to look for. I paced down the isle until I came across a section for weight loss pills. I looked up and down for anything that would catch my eye until I saw it, a bright green bottle with the word **Antifood** printed across it. Without thinking, I picked it up and examined the text.

Curves hunger for up to five hours! Never feel guilty about snacking between meals again!

A smile formed across my face as I held the bottle in my hand. I glanced at the price.

$7.99.

"What?" I exclaimed. I dropped my head when I had realized how loud I had been.

A quickly placed the one bottle back on the shelf and began to exit the store. Before I left, I had already made a mental note to come back again before the day was done.

"How's your first day back in Japan?" Hojo sat at the counter of Dad's kitchen munching on a bag of soy chips.

"Fine." I said. I had hoped that he wouldn't be here when I came back home but, of course, that was too much to ask.

"Hey! How about I take you out today? We can go swimming or out to lunch later." He glanced at the clock, which read 10:25 and then glanced back at his chips. "Much later. Hmm, what do you say?"

"Um…I was thinking about going back out later."

"Well that's great! Where do you wanna go? I'll come too so you won't be alone."

It was so hard to say no to him. He was just so happy. "Uh…great." I cringed at my words. "I was thinking about going to a book store." I didn't lie; I was planning on making a trip to one after I went back to my drug store.

"Great! I know this really nice one that's not far from here."

"Perfect." I gritted my teeth. Hojo popped another chip into his mouth causing a slight case of nausea to creep through me.

"We can go in a minute or too. I need to make a few phone calls and then we can head out."

I grabbed at, probably, the only chance I had left, "Great! I need to go make a quick errand anyway. How about you meet me at the drug store down the street when you're done? I'll be waiting outside on the bench."

Hojo looked a tad bit puzzled and then spoke, "Alright. That sounds…great."

"Okay. The I'll see you later, Hojo." I ran upstairs to change into jeans and a fitted, black T and grab a few tens from my bag. Without another word, I was out the door and almost running down the busy sidewalk.

"$8.10."

Of course…tax.

I handed the clerk a ten and slipped the pills in a purse that I had to run back to get out of the house. It would have been pretty obvious if I had a bottle of diet pills in my pocket.

"Have a nice day."

I smiled and nodded and then made my exit.

A clean getaway.

I couldn't believe how easy it was, but I definitely wasn't complaining.

Once I left the drug store I sat down on the bench against its wall just like I promised Hojo I would. I didn't have to wait long, however. It was almost scary how close he had been to seeing me purchase my secret. I shivered at the thought.

"Hey! You ready?"

"Yea. So were to?"

"The book store is only a couple blocks away. Before we go I want to get some coffee. You want anything?"

I shook my head.

Hojo lead me into the same café that I had been in that morning. When we entered, the same two girls stood behind the counter, except the girl with the piercing had her hair down this time. She was absolutely gorgeous. Her chestnut tresses touched below her shoulders, hiding her dangling earrings. Her eyes were a light brown and sparkled whenever the light hit them just right. She wore two necklaces: one, a chocker with a blue stone in the middle of it and the other, a silver sun hanging from a long, thin silver chain around her neck.

"Hey, Sango."

"Hey, Hojo." Her voice was like an angel's. I felt sorry for the other girl behind the counter, I was about to die from one day of her beauty, the other girl had to put up with it almost everyday.

"The usual."

Sango nodded before she went to work on Hojo's order. The other girl stayed where she was, reading a magazine, every now and then looking up at the T.V. that had been placed in the top right hand corner of the café.

When Sango turned her head her eyes met mine and I couldn't help but blush, something I never did.

"I haven't seen you before." Her smile was even brighter than before.

I hesitated before I answered. "I'm Kagome." Pause. "Hojo is my cousin." I felt embarrassed for my British had interfered with my Japanese again.

She continued to smile, "Hojo! You never told me you had a cousin. So, does that make you Mr. Higurashi's daughter?"

I nodded, "Yes."

"Hmm, interesting. I didn't even know he had a daughter. I'm sorry, I'm being very rude."

Despite her looks she was very polite.

"So are you his daughter from his first marriage or second?"

I was shocked by this question. Dating, I had figured my father had done, but marriage…boy did that one hit home.

"Um…she's the daughter of his first wife, Megumi." Hojo replied for me.

"Oh." Sango looked worried, like she had said something wrong. I decided to lie to make her feel a tad better.

"I'm sorry. It's just that I hardly ever discuss my Dad's previous marriage…I guess it's just one of those things that hardly get brought up." Boy was that the truth.

"Oh." She seemed to react better to this, "I'm sorry. Well, it's very nice to meet you." She smiled again and then handed Hojo his coffee. "Have a good day. And again it was nice meeting you, Kagome. Come back again sometime."

I nodded and then turned to follow Hojo out there door.

That's when I blew up.

"SECOND MARRIAGE?" I bellowed. There was no way he was getting out of this one.

Hojo motioned his hands in a "clam down" gesture. "We'll discuss this later."

"Oh no! We'll discuss this now!"

"Kagome." Hojo was stern and for a moment I felt a hint of fear from his tone, but I quickly shook it off.

"I want an explanation, Hojo."

"And you'll have one, from Miziyaka."

"Save me the hassle of having to ask him and tell me now." I insisted.

"Kagome. No."

I crossed my arms over my chest like I had done so many times before, and walked in silence until we reached the bookstore. I was pissed now.

After a purchase of four books, three mangas, and a CD, I was broke. Okay, not if you count $1.50 as having money.

"So do you normal go over board with shopping when you're upset?" Hojo continued to glance down at my over stuffed bag.

"Yes. And I told you I'm not upset I'm P-Oed"

"Ah ha. Of course."

As we left the bookstore I noticed that same silver hair that always made my stomach turn in front of me.

"Damn."

"What is it, Kagome?"

"Shh!!" I hissed, but it was too late, he turned around.

At first I thought he was going to pick on me for my bag of books plus one CD, but much to my surprise he said nothing and turned his attention back to the person in front of him.

"Hey, I know that kid." Hojo whispered.

I groaned. "So do I."

"How?"

I looked at the guy walking next to Inuyasha and recognized him as Miroku. "They were both part of this stupid summer foreign exchange student program that Great Britain was apart of apparently. My friend, Jason, made friends with them."

"How odd…that he would be…never mind. I hear that those programs are a lot of fun." As I did, Hojo kept his voice no higher than a whisper. "They look really good on Collage applications, as long as you aren't being sent away for other purposes."

"What do you mean?"

"Oh well I've heard about the occasional "bad child" being put into a program like that so his or her parents wouldn't have to be responsible for then over the summer or school year."

"Oh…" I started to go into a thought but quickly left it.

"Anyway. Your father won't be coming home until around seven, so you're going to have to put up with for a while longer."

"Fine." I said, flatly. My focus remained on the hair in front of me.

"Have you eaten yet? You need to eat something."

Realizing that Hojo was right, I acted like I was searching the cabinets for food. My stomach started to grumble and I knew that I couldn't hold back the urge much longer. I pulled out a Granola bar and munched on that, hoping it would at least stop the grumbling.

"I'll be in your Dad's office for a while. I have some paper work I need to be working on."

"Okay." I said, relieved I was getting some time to be by myself.

Once Hojo left, I took out the bottle of pills that had been stashed in my purse, and popped open the lid. The directions said to take one after every meal. I counted my granola bar as a meal as I placed the pill in my mouth and washed it down with a few gulps on water.

Then, I waited.

"Day one." I mumbled to myself, and then I marched upstairs to see what wonders my computer could do.

AN- Long I know. Hope you liked it! Please review!


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